Take a fifteen minute break

Posted: May 6, 2013 in Everything in Between

Unless you’re a pornstar, there’s nothing worse than getting it from all angles  at work.

 

We’ve all had it, that moment during the day when lunch is long gone and your boss is moments away from giving you a colonoscopy. You’re getting calls left and right and the minute you sit down to do something you get interrupted by the most useless shit on the planet. “Hey can you draft and email and send it to me….”, there might be nothing worse than being told to write someone else’s writing .

 

We’ve concluded that at this peak moment of stress you might lose your mind, which is why getting up and either taking a fifteen minute walk or sitting on the john for 15 minutes of inactivity are great ideas.

 

Let’s take both ends of the spectrum. At this point you’re on edge as you keep dealing with mindless shit, not only that but the fact that it’s only 2:30 means there’s plenty more time for more bullshit. The more you agree to do, the more shit they’ll give you later down the line. It’s like having a fast horse, keep pressing it until the thing shits the bed.

 

On the other hand, right while your boss begins telling you to wipe his ass, stand up, head towards the door, and cite whatever you need to to buy 15 minutes. Buy yourself some freedom and be gone just long enough so that if anyone asks where you went, you can slam them with a “had mexican food last night” or “girlfriend just broke up with me”. These excuses have to be reasonable enough so you look confident saying it, and it invokes just enough fear into the recipient that it might be true that they won’t ask you again in the near future.


If you do this successfully for about 5 consecutive days, no one will ask about it, and you’ve now bought a permanent 15 minute break everyday. If you think sitting there, working for the next 15 minutes, and stressing yourself out will help you climb the corporate ladder better than the guy sitting next to you, then you might need to rethink your strategy.

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