The Gym

Posted: April 28, 2013 in For The Jock
Tags: , , ,

I’ve been at the same job for three years. Going to work for me feels like taking a dump after eating chipotle for a week straight. This morning was a different because I was convinced to go to the gym the night before. I woke up at six thirty and kicked my iPhone and some balled up tissue papers out of the bed in the process.


I’m at the gym in under twenty minutes which isn’t bad. The first person I see is a 300 lb woman working the counter. Maybe it’s me, but at a place that’s endorsing weight loss, there had to be a better example. She swipes my card, checks out my ass, and takes a bite out of a breakfast burrito all in a span of 5 seconds.


It was one of those days where I never checked the bike and ended up sitting a puddle of someone elses hard work. The good news is the girl next to me has given a couple looks, either because she’s interested, or because she knows I just sat in a lake. Either way I start getting on my way for the next 30 minutes.


I decide to do a couple pullups before my way out and grab some water. The water fountain line is short, but the guy in front of me is the toughest guy at the gym. He takes a solid minute at the fountain, then proceeds to turn around and eyeball me. Before I can get water he doubles back down and goes in for round two.


These people make my day. Nothing gets my monday morning started more than a steroid filled douchebag who’s watermongering at the gym. If I said more than one word he probably would’ve killed me. I opt for option two. Instead of getting water I crop dust the area and head for the exit.

Nice start to the day.

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